Sports Briefs: The Kings' Ransom

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Chris: I hate seeing Bigfoot unemployed. Having been out of work since 2008, think of all the Social Security he’s missed out on. I don’t know if he’s been actively trying to find a job, but I can imagine it would be difficult for a Yeti to find work in the food service industry. However, if the only hope of Squatch being able to resume his duties as a mascot in Seattle is for Sacramento to lose their basketball team, then I am more than willing to assist Squatch in his ongoing job hunt.

Brad: There are always the same pros and cons when you talk about moving a team to another city. Moving the team would be a financial hit for Sacramento; losing something that could generate revenue is always a negative. Then you have the fan loss in Sacramento and the fan gain in Seattle, so you even out there. Sacramento Mayor Johnson has promised improvements to keep the Kings where they are. So that could boost not only the fan base but revenue, as well as the local economy. All things that would help keep the Kings in California.

Ralphie: The Kings aren't very good, and maybe moving to a new city will help give them a fresh start.

Joe: Great move by Kings to Seattle, if for no other reason than the whopping tax structure, personal and corporate, that exists in California.

Chris: All I can think of is that while a sasquatch would be off unemployment in Washington, there would be a 6-foot-tall lion going on unemployment in California.

Joe: The Maloof bros. don't like investing in ventures that lose money--enough said.

Ralphie: They're making a lot of money in the sale, and the team has to have caused them a lot of stress. I think it's probably the best decision.

Brad: I think they may be jumping the gun a bit. You can't just up and move a team to a new town. There is lots to work out. League approval to get.

Chris: I have been unable to determine thus far if the NBA is against Sacramento as a whole or just against Joe and Gavin Maloof. If Fay Vincent or a relative of Kenesaw Mountain Landis was running the NBA, the 2002 NBA championship would have been stripped from the Los Angeles Lakers. But since David Stern may love the Lakers more than his own wife, he was easily able to overlook the fact that his referees were convicted of fixing the 2002 Western Conference Finals. The Kings have never overcome that, which would probably sound more historic and romantic if it was henceforth titled “The Curse of Scot Pollard.”

Ralphie: I don't follow basketball much, but I think a move is important for the team at this point.

Brad: I think the best for the league is what will be best for the team. An offer from a group in Sacramento seems like it would be the best fit for the team and the city.

Joe: Let any counter-bid become subject to re-bid by the contenders--the Maloofs need more cash. The league should stay out of the bidding process.

Chris: Contacting Tim Donaghy, creating a suitable disguise and pseudonym and paying him to fix games in the Kings’ favor could generate substantial income for the Maloofs.

Brad: I think while they are looking at the best financial move for their interests, it may only benefit them.

Ralphie: I don't know a lot about them except that they're rich!

Joe: One of my best friends had dinner with them and Adrien Brody in Las Vegas a few years back and said they were very personable. Darn, I missed that date.

Chris: Having seen their team vamoose (I just said “vamoose”) town five years ago for Oklahoma City, I wonder how Seattle would feel about gaining a team under similar circumstances. Is Squatch prepared to handle himself against an onslaught of Saramento-clad zombies, holding up signs which read “Bring Back Our Kings”?

Ralphie: If I were a Supersonics fan, I think I'd rather have an expansion team come to town.

Brad: I would want an expansion team, as opposed to a competing team. But if you are a fan of a team, you will probably be a fan of that team no matter what.

Joe: Any fan of sports would rather take existing players and build. More instant gratification than watching the baby grow.

Try on a new pair of Sports Briefs with the Gab Four every Friday. Find out more about Joe, Chris, Brad and Ralphie, and read their solo columns on their individual pages.

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