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"Joe" is Abe Honeycutt of Minneapolis, Minn. A misplaced (and suspiciously vicious) George Mikan elbow to the eye socket forever
changed Honeycutt's life. With his promising basketball career cut short, Honeycutt turned his attention to other, less fruitful
gains of employment. After failed stints as a hot dog vendor, juggling musician, and stand-in for film legend Abe Vigoda failed,
Honeycutt chased a much less noble pursuit. He would become a writer.
Honeycutt's writing talents garnered immediate attention. Within a decade, he was a volunteer, (e.g., unpaid) reporter for
such esteemed publications as The East Peoria Gazette, The Menomonie Sentinel and The New York Times.
Although confirmation of his employment for at least one of these publications remains sketchy to this day.
Realizing that being fat, drunk, stupid and working for peanuts was no way to go through life, Honeycutt joined the Ringling
Brothers circus. Alas, he was despondent to realize that his deteriorating juggling skills made for poor tent-top entertainment.
He ventured back into the writing world, where he joined another circus. He became a copywriter, where he thrived amid entertaining
branding campaigns and more entertaining happy hour debacles.
Today, Honeycutt continues to collect intermittent paychecks as a freelance marketing writer and much more paltry paychecks
as a newly-appointed sports blog writer. But, he's also finally found his calling. Honeycutt is passionate about three things:
sports, pop culture humor and the written word. (Oh, and family. But that is irrelevant, unless he is able to leverage them
in one of his stories for humor purposes.)
George Mikan stole a lot from Honeycutt that fateful, fall day at the DePaul University gymnasium, but he didn’t take
everything. Honeycutt still has a keen eye (albeit, a glass one) for the intricacies, hypocrisies and musings of today's sports
world.
To contact Abe Honeycutt, send an e-mail and put
"To Joe" in the subject line.
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